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"Everything that I've wanted to say but haven't had the confidence to until now refers to a feeling of complete understanding of how my practice matured throughout the pandemic. The publication offers an autobiographical narrative of poetry, visual poetry, asemic writing, performance and photography that respond to the journey that I went on through the various lockdowns and periods of isolation, and the loneliness that ensued as a result of these. The first chapter of the book, 'Side A', addresses the days where I struggled with my mental wellbeing, and became outward reflections of inner feelings, and some respond to the hierarchical dynamic that became apparent in the hospitality industry. 'Side B' shares moments of how my practice became a method for working through these feelings in lockdown. The performances became ritualistic, and formed a big part of my daily routine throughout the ordeal. Experiencing this work in a tangible way is paramount to reading the emotive content it offers. Contemporary society is oversaturated with digital media across a great many platforms and I did not want my story to get lost in a split second of someone's screen time. Social media and virtual showcases can only communicate so far, and so this collection existing in a real space is a reminder to be physically present."--Ben Jenner, 2021